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To this day I do solemly swear - that your babies will be born spasticus exmortis. Your first will be still born. Your second will bear no arms and only one leg (with a dodgey knee). Your final spawn will be a complete spazmopod...and you will be forced to explain to all your friends that you have decided to start associating with creatures less than beautiful (namely your son - who you shall call Brian). Brian will be a loving child - but generally, a complete gibbering wreck. You will love him as only a mother can - and you will learn from this.
May you be visited on the 7th eve of the 3rd month by Old Mother Higgley - she will touch your forehead as yee sleep and the curse will be in place. Good day Monique. Extreitia Pomdradius
P.S - Say hi top Brian for me wont you dear...such a sweet little thing.
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