U.S. Marshals

Bomb Rating: 

Am I supposed to like Sam Gerard? I presume that I am, since that's usually a necessity for a main character in a feature film. Unfortunately, the guy is a wound-up imbecile.

If you actually paid money to see this film, I have a suggestion for you. Get up from wherever you are right now, walk into your kitchen, and find a turkey thermometer. Turkey thermometers usually have a round gauge attached to a long spike. Now, take that thermometer and, as hard as you can, plunge the spike into your head. Read the gauge. Odds are there's no temperature because you have no brain, because you were so stupid that you paid for a movie they already made a few years ago called "The Fugitive."

Warner Bros. even got sneaky about this one, titling it "U.S. Marshals" instead of "The Fugitive 2," which is what it should be called. If you think about that for any length of time, you quickly realize what an idiotic idea it is. What exactly is left to do with that story? Have two fugitives? Uh oh, I think I've just given somebody the idea for "The Fugitive 3."

As the title might indicate, "U.S. Marshals" shifts the focus to Sam Gerard (Tommy Lee Jones) and away from this movie's fugitive (Wesley Snipes), who's running around after supposedly murdering a couple of people. Naturally, the only answer to this mystery is that Wesley has some kind of excuse and in the process of hunting him down, Gerard will solve that mystery while also attaining a glowing respect for him.

Am I supposed to like Sam Gerard? I presume that I am, since that's usually a necessity for a main character in a feature film. Unfortunately, the guy is a wound-up imbecile. If he had a brain, "U.S. Marshals" would have consisted of two hours of Gerard sitting by the phone waiting for that call about some guy trying to clear his name or going through amputee records or something like that.

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