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Fanfics "Cranky Wars Episode 1: The Spamming Menace" was posted in May 2000 (though I wrote nearly all of it in 1999) and "Cranky Wars Episode 2: The Emperor Strokes Back" was posted (highly unluckily) on Sept 10, 2001. ("Episode 3" I got about 1/3rd of the way through and lost my will to finish it and haven't regained it.) Both were actually several different stories about different characters that were linked together by the "great war" in Crankyland. Most of these stories were pretty obvious spoofs of such famous movies as "Saving Private Ryan," "The Thin Red Line," "Schindler's List," "Blair Witch Project," "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon," "Titanic," and "Enemy at the Gates," with the whole general idea obviously being "Star Wars"-oriented.
But one story (which, coincidentally, featured my own Crankyland persona) eventually seemed to take a life of its own after originally being a play on both the bounty hunters aspects of the "Star Wars" movies and the Vincent- Jules segment of "Pulp Fiction." I realized that it was the only one that could be made original enough to actually stand on its own as a movie. So I adapted the "Bounty Hunters" stories from the fanfics into a real screenplay titled, aptly enough, "The Bounty Hunters." I left nearly all of the unique-sounding Crankyland handles intact (though I'm sure studio lawyers will have something else to say about that) and copied much of the dialogue directly from the fanfic to the real screenplay.
I had to change quite a number of things, though, including giving it an actual ending (which is still kind of open in case somebody wants to make a sequel -- probably won't be me), as "Episode 2" ended with a cliffhanger that is supposed to be resolved in "Episode 3." (For the record, the "Bounty Hunters" story that I've written in "Ep 3" so far is substantially different from anything that happens in the screenplay.) The biggest change I had to make was the setting. "Cranky Wars" were set in "Crankyland," which is really just an alternate universe modeled after our website. That would make almost zero sense to someone who didn't visit this website. But I had so much gravity- defying "wild stuff" and bizarre political wrangling going on in the screenplay that I couldn't possibly set it on earth, so I chose... a terraformed Mars of the future. Ultimately, though, despite a few original quirks, it's still just a "Kill Bill"-like joking homage to some of my favorite movies or scenes in movies, including "Lock, Stock & Two Smoking Barrels," "L. A. Confidential," "Young Guns 1," "The Good, the Bad & the Ugly," "Reservoir Dogs" and the two movies already mentioned, "Pulp Fiction and Star Wars." I do toss in a few extra "winks" to Crankyland beyond merely the character names.
The script made it to finalist status in one contest, but apparently did not win (at least they never told me it did). If it ever gets made (doesn't seem likely because it'd be a rather expensive R-rated flick with all the sci- fi stuff -- and if it does get made, they'll probably kill the heart of the humor to sanitize it down to PG-13 level), I will indeed send advanced screening passes to everyone in Crankyland that I can remember.
The original "Cranky Wars" threads are:
http://www.mrcranky.com/movies/wingcommander/134.html
http://www.mrcranky.com/movies/musketeer/41.html
(Actually, that "Musketeer" thread is the second of two for "Episode 2," as I paused for 9/11 and then started over.)
"The Bounty Hunters" screenplay features, from Crankyland, Chiz, Aron, Aurora, Emerald, Mr Mucus, Jet Lagomorph, Pseudonym, Alpan, xyz, Nick the Knife, Poor College Boy, Ringo_ate_my_baby, mendo, Bort, Karen G, grundle, Dan in Cincinnati, LRT and ModernRonin, plus one other "poster" who it should be obvious why I changed the name. And I apologize to all the other great Crankylanders who weren't part of the "Bounty Hunters" stories that get no mention in the real screenplay -- I just didn't think it was right to try to force handles into the screenplay that didn't actually belong in the story (or more like, I was too lazy to try -- it's already 120 pages anyway, that's plenty long enough).
On with the show...
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