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This new musical opens with Wal*mart associates punching in in the beginning singing "Who Wants To Live Forever". We then cut to three grungy students (Adam Sandler, David Spade, and Will Smith) at school where they have a special guest speaker (Regis Philbin) telling everyone that Kathy Lee's line of clothing is still being made by children in third world nations... and stores like Wal*mart are evil for carrying said clothing. The three students then decide to go protest outside a Wal*mart. They sing the old Whitney Houston "I belive the children are our future" song.
Soon, one of the students feels the need to go buy some gum. He goes into the Wal*mart but can NOT figure out which department gum would be in. Eventually, the other two get sick of waiting for him and go inside too. David buys all the Kathie Lee clothing convinced it'll make a tremendous statement when he burns them... despite having bought the clothes. Will meets a cute cashier (Vivica Fox) and sings a rap version "Fly Me To the Moon" with Tony Bennette who makes a cameo appearance as a cart pusher. The cashier decides to quit her job and become a protestor just like the three guys.
They decide they'll undo Wal*mart and Kathy Lee from within though and hide in one of the tents in Sporting Goods. The store closes. Will and Vivica start going at it. It's then that Adam and David develop an attraction for eachother and sing "We Kiss In a Shadow" from "The King and I". A security guard (John Cleese) catches the happy foursome inside the tent. The guard wants to join in & when he's told he can't, he throws a major tantrum like a really spoiled child before calling the cops. The cops come, and our band of rebels barely escapes with their lives... they don't escape with their clothes.
They run through the streets totally naked before stopping at a park singing "Where Do I Go?" Suddenly, they hear cackling... up in the sky!... it's a bird... it's a plane... no, it's Kathy Lee on a broomstick!!!! She chases them through the park... the rebels run into a graveyard. Since it's sacred ground, she can not set foot in there. Soon, the graves open up, and the dead rise. Hey, they got clothes. Will, Vivica, Adam, and David beat the corpses up and steal the clothes. We now see our happy little rebels sitting... they hear no signs of Kathy Lee... they figure it's safe to leave the grave yard.
As they leave the graveyard, Cody and Cassidy swoop in playing winged monkeys... they grab Vivica and David taking them to Kathy Lee's castle atop a mountain of skulls. We see small children sewing clothes and putting the clothes on hangers in a huge hall filled with rats and spiderwebs with blood splattered all over the walls while Kathy Lee sits back on her throne perched high upon a balcony above them glaring down while singing "Getting To Know You". Vivica and David are thrown into a cell while Kathy Lee tries to decid their cruel fate. She's really eating the role up here, people.
Will and Adam go to Wal*mart and tell the store manager (Mick Jagger) what has happened... their friends have been kidnapped and need to be rescued. The manager laughs and reminds them that Kathy Lee is a personal friend. He then goes onto perform "Sympathy For the Devil". Suddenly, the two winged monkeys fly in... we find out they're assistant managers... they carry Will and Adam to Kathy Lee's castle. There, we see a large courtroom where sits Judge Judy. The four rebel prisoners are brought foward. The scurity guard comes in as a witness as does the store manager and Kathy Lee. Judge Judy sentences the rebels to be beheaded out in Kathy Lee's courtyard immediately.
The crowd gathers to watch the execution. As Adam is led to be executed first, David sings "I Don't Know How To Love Him". Chop! One down. David's next as Vivica sings "I Believe". Chop! Two down. Vivica's turn. Will sings "You'll Never Walk Alone". Chop! Three down. As he's led to be executed, the crowd sings "Climb Every Mountain". Chop! We now see the severed heads of our four heroes being served on plates to the children who work for Kathy Lee. The kids sing "Food, Gloriouss Food" as they eat the rebels' brains whil kathy Lee sings "Children Will Listen".
The movie closes with the Wal*mart associates punching in for another day at work singing "Who Wants To Live Forever (Reprise)". The end.
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