It's practically a religion in and of itself for undereducated and egotistic movie stars to weigh in on politics and other cultural issues because they've been stroked their whole professional lives i

I've found a wonderful and simple filter to find out who on the planet needs to be removed from it immediately to prevent their numerous, ignorant offspring from taking down the entire human race with

Joseph Ratzinger -- not to be mistaken for John Ratzenberger, who played Cliff on "Cheers"-- was elected the new Pope by the conclave of cardinals on Tuesday, April 19, 2005.

Let's give credit where credit is due.

It seems that most of our politicians these days are no more than grandstanding media whores, who have about as much business being in positions of power as Paris Hilton does competing on Jeopardy.

I'm tired of people's children. Sick of them, in fact. It seems that no matter where I go, somebody's kid is screaming his or her head off and pissing me off.

Let's face it, most of you are complete suckers.

So apparently, SpongeBob SquarePants is gay. And should be banned. Then arrested. Then burned to a spongy crisp in the everlasting fires of Christian Hell.

I don't celebrate Christmas. I don't celebrate any holidays in December. None. Zero. Zip. As far as I'm concerned, Christmas is like a cancer. I'm not religious and I don't participate.

There's been a lot of vitriol hurled at both Democrats and Republicans this election, but I'd like to focus on one party that has, until this point, largely escaped some richly deserved criticism.